I Want Everything

So it's been a while.  My mind is always swirling so much that it's hard to focus my thoughts for another blog entry.  However I feel like an update is needed since so much has changed, so much is going on.  

Of course everything is different since the last blog entry.  I'm only still seeing one of those people on my mysteriously coded list and frankly, the code was so mysterious that I don't even remember who most of them are!  Obviously, they weren't all that special.  Except one.

Yes, I'm now in a poly relationship with an adorable bi trans girl.  So cool.  The situation is just perfect for me right now.  I love everything we do together.  It's helping me narrow down just what I want and what I need in addition to what I already have.  It's so cool I can hardly put it into coherent words for this blog.  Maybe I'll just leave it at that for now.

But gaps need filling in.  Since she has a primary relationship, I'm still looking for - what? - my own primary? - more fun friends to see regularly?  This is the question that needs answering and like everything else, I may not know the answer until I find it.  That's the cool thing about being poly; you can keep your options open at all times and everything can be fluid, nothing stagnates.  It's what you want it to be and I love that.  

I still love meeting new people but that has slowed down a bit.  For all of these months, I've been saying that I'm narrowing down what I want, raising my standards, etc, but I think it's only now starting to happen.  I still love the attention, but what I really want is more of what I have now only with different people who can fill in the gaps and meet my needs that aren't being met in my current relationship.  Or they can just give me more of the awesome things that I AM getting in my relationship!  More awesome is always welcome.  

I've joined a couple new websites to try and meet people who are into the things I'm into.  So far I haven't met anyone in person from them, but it's not because of a lack of offers!  I'm just picky and the right opportunity hasn't come up yet.  I am currently texting an adorable 23 year old guy I just met yesterday and we have plans to meet this week.  We both like the same things, both have the desire to get to know each other and experiment and figure things out together, AND he seems really sweet.  What else do I want?  OOH and he's bisexual, my favorite, and he has agreed to wear a skirt and fishnets for me because I think that is the sexiest thing ever.  

I've had random offers but nothing has come of them mostly due to scheduling problems but some just because I didn't think they were the right fit.  I went on a "real date" recently with an adorable bi guy and we got along really really well.  The thing is, he's turning out to be a super flakey doofus!  He says he wants to see me again but can never seem to make the time and keeps breaking our plans.  I'm done.  I'm not reserving my time for him anymore.  I'll find other cute boys who have the time and the desire to spend some of it with me.  That's all I want really.

So things are good.  I am making it through this awful holiday season intact.  I will come out of it in January a year older but infinitely happier.